Arming Yourself Against Your Thoughts: The AWARE Stage

Imagine you are a farmer, and your goal is to cultivate a thriving orchard full of beautiful, ripe oranges. But one morning, you walk outside and notice that the leaves on your trees have holes, and the fruit isn’t growing as expected.

A good farmer wouldn’t simply ignore the problem or hope it resolves itself. Instead, they would investigate; examining the trees to identify what’s harming their growth. Is it pests? Poor soil quality? A lack of water?

In many ways, our lives mirror this farming analogy. If we desire a rich and fulfilling life, we must become aware of what is hindering our personal growth. Just as a farmer examines their trees, we must examine our minds and the thoughts that shape our behaviors. One of the most significant barriers to living in alignment with our values is the way our minds dictate our actions; often without us even realizing it.

Introducing the A.R.R.M. Strategy

At The Harvest Clinic, we introduce a framework to help individuals take control of their thoughts and behaviors - to arm yourself against your thoughts. This strategy is called A.R.R.M., which stands for:

• Aware

• Recognize

• Reframe

• Move

Today, we focus on the first step: awareness, which, though simple in theory, is often challenging in practice. This is because the time between having a thought and responding in action is incredibly quick. Recognizing our thoughts before they dictate our behavior requires skill and practice.

Becoming Aware of Your Thoughts

Let’s consider a simple, everyday example. Imagine you are in a grocery store, rushing to get in and out quickly. As you navigate the aisles, you spot someone you know; someone who tends to engage in long conversations. Before you even process the thought consciously, you find yourself skipping that aisle to avoid an interaction. This is a perfect example of how thoughts impact behavior at lightning speed, often without deliberate awareness.

So, how do we slow down and become more mindful of our thoughts? One practical way is by tuning into our feelings first.

Using Feelings as a Guide - Arming Yourself Against Your Thoughts

Often, feelings surface before we fully recognize the thoughts behind them. Have you ever had a moment where you just felt “off,” but couldn’t immediately pinpoint why? Then, later, you remember; perhaps an overdue bill, an unresolved conflict, or a stressful deadline. Feelings act as signals, directing us to underlying thoughts.

To cultivate awareness, follow these steps:

1. Identify the Feeling – When you notice a behavior that doesn’t align with how you want to act, pause and ask yourself: What am I feeling? It could be anxiety, guilt, stress, rejection, or sadness.

2. Ask Yourself Why – Once you’ve identified the emotion, dig deeper: Why am I feeling this way? This will help you uncover the underlying thought behind the emotion.

   
   

For instance, imagine you attend a social gathering expecting a close friend to acknowledge you, but they walk past without saying hello. You suddenly feel anxious.

If you ask yourself why, you may uncover a thought like,

Did I do something to upset them?

If anger arises instead, the thought might be,

Who do they think they are to ignore me?

Digging Deeper: The Downward Arrow Technique

Our initial thoughts often stem from deeper, more ingrained beliefs. To explore these beliefs, we use a method called the downward arrow technique. This technique involves repeatedly questioning the meaning behind our thoughts to reveal core beliefs.

Consider someone who frequently puts others’ needs above their own; a classic people-pleaser. Over time, they may begin to feel neglected and unappreciated. Here’s how they can use the downward arrow technique:

• Feeling Identified: Sadness and frustration

• Thought Behind Feeling: I do so much for others, but they don’t reciprocate.

• What’s so bad about that? It means people don’t really care about me.

• What does that mean? It means I don’t really matter.

• What does that say about me? I have no worth.

By continuing this process, they uncover a deeply rooted belief about their self-worth, which is influencing their emotional responses and behaviors.

Awareness as the First Step

Recognizing these deeper beliefs is crucial because thoughts function like icebergs; what we consciously notice is just the tip, while the larger, more influential beliefs remain submerged beneath the surface.

Developing awareness of our thoughts helps us regain control over our behaviors rather than being unconsciously driven by them.

This week, we encourage you to practice awareness in your daily life:

• Set aside time each day to reflect on your emotions.

• Ask yourself why you feel the way you do.

• Use the downward arrow technique to uncover deeper beliefs.

By honing this skill, you take the first step toward cultivating a more fulfilling, value-driven life; just as a farmer who tends to the roots of their trees ensures a bountiful harvest.

Next week, we’ll continue with the second step: Recognize; learning how to identify and challenge unhelpful thought patterns.

At The Harvest Clinic, we believe in addressing the roots of our struggles to create lasting, meaningful change. We hope this insight helps, and we look forward to continuing this journey with you next week!

Here is a video below to help you understand more about the aware step in the ARRM strategy

ARRMing yourself from your thoughts: The Awareness Stage | The Harvest Clinic

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